10 Fates
by Yuki Suou
Summary: ... that await the Mary Sues in Middle-Earth.
1. Chapter 1: Devoured by orcs

Disclaimer: I do not own anything you recognize.

No Mary Sue was harmed during the making of these stories. (You believed that?)

**Chapter 1: Devoured by orcs**

"Muller!", yelled the Maths teacher.

Startled, the addressed person looked up.

"How many times do I have to tell you NOT to use cell phones im my class?"

"Umm…"

"Yes, a very intelligent answer. Now hand that thing over." As she hesitated, Mr. Smith growled "Now."

Reluctantly, she handed it over to him. It was a sorry thing to happen, that too, just when she was looking at the picture of Legolas. Her beautiful Legolas. Her true love. What use was that stupid lecture when she could plan for the dress she was going to wear on their wedding? Sure Trigonometry could not help her reach the inviting arms of her lust, errr, love?

"now would you please wipe that stupid look off your face and concentrate on the darned thing I am teaching?"

He was so, so cruel, the unkindest person on the face of Earth.

Then she heard the whispers.

"Bet you all my possessions that she was thinking about that stupid elf boy", snickered Student A.

"Nope, no need for that. It is a universal truth. Like the sun goes round the Earth, oops, the opposite actually", finished Student B, with a smirk plastered to his face.

"Quiet!", shouted the already livid teacher once more.

"He is not stupid, THEY make him look stupid", mumbled student C.

"Whatever."

Josephine Andromeda Aranossë Aravellas Muller, in short, JAAAM was shocked. They said….. they said, Legolas was stupid! And she made him look stupid! Those heartless students, how could they? She bit her lips to stop herself from crying. But nothing could stop one perfect drop of tear from falling. They had slighted the name of the only one person she knew who would never treat her so badly. So typical of those monsters. She knew at that moment she was wrong about Mr. Smith. No, he wasn't the cruelest person in the world. They were.

And then again, how could she forget her family. Surreptitiously, she dabbed her eye (taking care not to remove the mascara) and glanced at the scar running along her dainty little finger.

Josephine Andromeda Aranossë Aravellas Muller, a.k.a, JAAAM had the toughest life one could ever imagine. Some of her woes were already listed above, to know more, read the next paragraph. You can skip it if you wish, you will miss nothing.

Where to start? Her family? Her father never, for once, cared about her. She remembered the time he had silenced her with a withering look (which, according to her sister was a weirded out look) when she had requested for a wedding dress made of mithril, surely it was not too much to ask for as a would-be princess, was it? Her mother was no less evil. Always, both of her parents went on and on about how good her sister aws, why she could not be more like her, etcetera etcetera. It was due to her mother that she has got the ugly scar on her fingers. It was from the time she had to pick up the shards of the broken vase. She tried to explain that it was an accident that she broke the vase, but no one seemed to listen to her. That witch sister of her even called her names (airhead). What was so great about her anyways, she was always jealous of her beauty and spent her time doing useless things. And the way she laughed when she talked about the love of her life.

Okay, sad story over. You can start reading now.

The class ended as she was revisiting those hurtful memories. She suddenly became aware of the fact that the whole class was staring at her. This happened often. Her beauty was a bane to her existence. Smiling shyly, she ducked her head.

She heard the tired voice of Mr. Smith. "Clearly, you didn't listen to a single word I said." Then he repeated slowly as she looked up, confused. "You will have to bring your parents to get your cell phone back. Understood?"

Horrorstruck, she could only nod mutely. No! Not her parents! She could already feel the students smiling behind her back. She knew they were going to abuse her, ridicule her as soon as the teacher left. She picked up her bag and dashed out of the room. She could feel tears prickling her eyes. She cannot go home. She will run away. Yes, she will run away. She has read enough fanfiction to know that if she entered the woods next to her school, she will reach Middle-Earth. Yes, that's what she would do.

* * *

Meanwhile, in Middle-Earth,

The orcs and the uruk-hais had just finished their mad race for the day and had dumped their prisoners on the ground carelessly.

One of the little creatures they had captured bit his lip to prevent the howl of pain from escaping his mouth. He knew all too well what would happen if those monsters heard it. But….

He looked around. His cousin was still unconscious.

"Merry?", he whispered. He was careful to keep his voice low. He would not risk the repetition of the event that had occurred earlier.

No response.

"Merry!", he tried a little bit louder.

This time, he opened his eyes.

"Uggh. Pip? I am awake."

Pippin sent a silent thanks to the forces that be. They had faced enough loss as it is. He could not bear the loss of his closest friend, too.

Merry did not fail to notice the relief flooding his younger cousin's feature.

He cracked a smile. He had only seen that look before when they used to escape Farmer Maggot's dog safely. How times change.

"No need to be so worried. I won't die so soon. I promised, remember?"

"Shut up, scumbags!" Two boots collided with each of their sides. As the pain subsided, Pippin could only think of one thing.

Promises won't keep them alive.

He tried to listen to the argument that had broken out between their captors. They argued a lot. But the ongoing one was… It was enough make him want to retch.

"Heard that? They want to eat us!" he whispered to Merry.

Merry nodded. "But the leader doesn't seem to agree."

"That could be our only hope."

"I think this is how the mushrooms feel when we attack them."

Pippin grimaced. Merry did have a sordid sense of humour.

Suddenly, a loud pop was heard. It even stopped the quarrel among the orcs.

A girl, hardly out of her teens, was standing near the fire lit by the uruks. The light of the fire amplified her perfect complexion. It shone on her hair like a thousand crystals. Her luminous eyes (under voluminous lashes) shone with different colour. Her figure….

Pippin paled. Merry gasped. Suddenly, they remembered, The Dark Lord was not the worst form of evil.

"Is that…"

"…..what I think that is?"

* * *

It was a beautiful starry night, just beside a magical forest, what was its name again? Hmm, Fangirl. That must be it.

That was what she first noticed when she came out of the portals. Not the threatening orcs, no. because noticing them was too mainstream.

But when she did, she almost fainted. There it was again. Everyone staring at her. She blushed scarlet. They didn't know that she has already given her heart to someone else.

She could predict what would happen next. Blinded by her beauty, and loveliness, the enemy would forget their malice against the world and fight to earn her hand. She paled at the thought of how many lives would be lost due to her loyalty to Legolas. She opened her mouth to speak, to prevent the impending disaster…

_~One can plan for the change in  
weather and time  
But I never planned for the change in your mind…~_

"It seems meat is back on menu, boys!"

* * *

"But I thought…"

"Don't think, Merry. They NEVER die." Pippin barely resisted the shudder.

"At least, it is not after us!"

"It seems meat is back on menu, boys!"

All of the blood-thirsty monsters rushed to the spot, captives forgotten for the moment.

They looked at each other. And both knew what was going on in the others mind.

Time to escape.

"Seems it will die this time."

He has never been so wrong.

For in their hurry to escape, they failed to notice the sparkling cloud of glitters that had suddenly appeared where the abomination stood.

* * *

Later, when the Éored of the Third Marshall slaughtered the uruks, none of them questioned why those beasts where in such a dazed state. Neither did they appear to notice the pink glitters that covered the abominations of Saruman.

After all, they all had dreadful memories regarding pink glitters.

* * *

Disclaimer 2: The song lyrics belong to Taylor Swift. Not me.

A/N: Well, it seems Pippin was right after all. They don't really die. :D What do you think? Read and review please!


	2. Chapter 2: Executed by Nazgul

Disclaimer : I only own the Mary Sues. Nothing more. Nothing less.

* * *

**Chapter 2: Executed by Nazguls.**

The sun, once again, was ending her daily journey.

Birds were going back to their nests, cattle were returning to their respective barns and people were on their way to the nice cosy homes, beckoning to them with a promise of a warm fire and hot soup. All the routine activity of the day was just coming to a halt for the night.

But in the forests, the scenario was quite different. As the sun disappeared from the horizon, one by one, the creatures of the night started to come to life once again, after the death like slumber. Darkness himself started to creep up from beneath the roots and shrubs, and spreading upwards, downwards, forwards, backwards, in every direction possible. He was determined to snuff out the last vestiges of that which he feared the most, that which prevented him from dominating the world once and forever. But for now, it was a moment of victory that, though, short-lived, was worth the effort.

And Darkness was not alone in his devilry. He had his greatest friend and worst rival with him, Fear. Fear, who sought out not only to the minds that were naturally afraid, but also slithered in quietly, inside those hearts that did not care about him. Even the bravest of all souls succumbed to his manipulations. And his deeds were all the more amplified if his companion lent him a hand. True, they fought among each other regarding supremacy, but they knew one thing for sure. To overshadow the world, they needed co-operation.

A horse cantered along a narrow path inside the forest. His rider, a dark hooded figure, understood the conversations of the aforementioned entities all too well. Because he, who was long ago a king of great renown, was now an embodiment of those two things himself. He spurred his horse to a gallop and let out a terrifying shriek, the only means of communication remaining to the likes of them.

The Nine were supposed to meet that day. Long after searching for The One that bound their fates to the Dark Lord, they had finally found a lead, in the form of a wretched creature that had spit out two precious words

"Shire…Baggins….."

It was long since they had walked the face of Arda and to find "Baggins", they first needed to find "Shire". They had decided on the meeting to set their course to find the place and retrieve The One.

He could already see the others assembling. Not actually see, but more like feel. With a final spurt of speed, his horse brought him to his allies. His peers.

The world has changed a lot. So have the countries and the places. They needed to find that darned place before anything happened.

They were just debating on their course in that strange hissing language, when they heard a loud crack.

"What was that?", said Nazgul number 2. And immediately clapped his hand over his mouth (or where it should be) in a very un-Nazgul like manner.

"You can speak?" wondered the Witch King a.k.a Necromancer a.k.a Nazgul number 1.

"Uh oh…"

"You don't think?"

"Not again!"

A collective groan was heard from the group.

"Ummm, guys? I don't think we should stay here anymore." Squeaked No. 9.

"Since when are we afraid of anything? And GUYS?" shrieked No.1. "Now we are speaking modern. Great, just great."

"I… I don't understand!" No.9 looked befuddled. "It seems something is messing with the circuits in my brain!"

"Neurons, you mean." Corrected No. 5.

No. 2 pointed to one side quietly, "I think that might be the cause of our problems."

All the heads swiveled to locate the source of their "other-worldly" trouble.

Sure enough, a woman in her mid-twenties was standing in the clearing that No. 2 pointed out. He ran a mental list of things…..

Beautiful beyond comparison. Check.

Perfectly curvaceous body. Check.

Long black hair that outshone Luthien's by a mile. Check.

Dress which was modestly revealing (that is, it left nothing to imagination). Check.

Black, why black? Oh, she must be the Evil!type. Then, black kohl that nearly covered her whole eyes. Check.

Wand. Check.

Wait, a wand?

A WAND?

"My, my, so the Nazzykins have answered the Dark Mark? It seems I apparated just in time. Now, kneel." She said in a sickeningly sweet voice that made even the Nazguls shudder.

"What apparate? What Dark Mark? And who are you to order us to kneel?" barked the Witch King.

"You don't say?" Evil!Sue seemed genuinely surprised. "you don't know, like, what Dark Mark is?"

"No and I don't think he should know," interjected No.2, cutting off the outrageous retort of No.1. "That guy seriously is having some ego problem," he mused. "Anyway, who are you?" he asked. "Not that I don't know", he added under his breath.

The Evil!Sue, tried to look intimidating as she answered "I am (insert a ridiculously long name here, because the author's imagination is failing her), descendent of Salazar Slytherin and Lord Voldemort. I am the result of the union of…"

"Aren't you in the wrong fandom?" asked No. 5.

She sneered."That was what I was coming to, before you decided to interrupt. As I was saying, I am the result of the union of….."

"We don't need to know that, woman! Just state your business here." No.1 was literally boiling with rage.

No.2 whispered to No.1 urgently, "No, we need to! Otherwise we won't be able to get rid of this abomination."

"Don't you dare talk to me like that, you stupid ugly zombies!" she shrieked in a particularly high note.

No one paid her any heed.

The Witch King looked skeptically at No. 2, "You're sure?"

"Yes, let me handle this."

No.1 consented uncertainly.

"Are you even listening, you dolts?"

No. 2 nodded. "Yes, My Lady. Please continue."

Satisfied at the tone of the Nazgul, she said, "So, as I was saying, Sauron fell in love with the grand-daughter of Lord Voldemort and I was born as a result of their undying love."

No. 2 coughed and it seemed contagious, as the others also hacking fits of cough which seemed suspiciously like, "Breaking *cough* of Fourth *cough* Dimension, *cough* anyone?"

Since her brain capacity was less than the size of a peanut, she failed to understand this and continued, "Then, an Elf-Prince came and killed my mother and I have come for revenge."

"..."

"…."

"…."

"…."

"She wasn't talking about Kreacher by any chance, was she?" whispered No.5.

"Nah, I think it's Legolas." No.9 squeaked back.

"What did you say your age was?" inquired No. 2.

"Why, I am barely 20 years!"

He dismounted his horse.

"So you claim to be the daughter of the Dark Lord?"

She tossed her head and said, "Yes and you better kneel and pledge your allegiance to me, like they do with sword, you know."

He nodded and took out his sword with a deadly hisssss.

Everyone waited with bated breath.

Then he cut off her head. Clean.

And the Witch King observed all this without a single comment.

And like always, as their memories of their encounter with the Sauron!Sue started to fade with her beheaded body going "Poof" in black glitters, he could not contain his anger any longer. He shrieked out at the last moment,

" #$ #%$% #$, how the Mordor can the Dark Lord have a twenty year old daughter when he has been a bleeping eyeball for nearly a whole darned Age?"

* * *

**A/N:** So that's the second chapter. Phew!

Now, replying to reviews:

No. of reviews received till 13/05/2014: **3**

**BorysBorys: **You just wait! It will become crueler. Hope you enjoy this chapter as well.

**kaitlynchosenisme**: You really have been a great support to me. Thank you. I always wait for your PMs.

**Ginny(Guest): **Did you actually read the whole story? It IS a Mary-Sue story, but the genre is parody. And about the poor writing part, well I would love your advice on how to improve it. Hope this chapter meets your satisfaction.

**A/N 2:** You know, review is the food to our inspirations. If you don't want it to die, then what are you waiting for? :D Press the little button underneath!


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